i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
you didnt know i had herpes?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
A bitchslap is in order.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
