Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
