Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
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