Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
