I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize