Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
