you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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