Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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