thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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