I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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