Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
