did you get engaged???
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize