eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
