i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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