dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
