If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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