I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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