Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
