how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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