On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
