he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
