She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize