absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
