everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
