the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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