I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
