weddingsv make me drug and hornr
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I need a burrito and a hug.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
