Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
