2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
