he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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