Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
