he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
