Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize
