I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
