so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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