I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
