dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
