Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
