He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
