IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize