please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
