No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You took a bar mat shot.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
