the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
