I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
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