you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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