Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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