We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
