just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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