I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
