Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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