You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
