We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
she peed on how many people?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
