Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize